I have been thinking a lot about Rocky’s mom (see Grocery Store Gripes), Rocky, and his little sister who was sitting in the cart screaming at the top of her lungs.  In todays day and age so many people would give Rocky’s mom THE look (you know, the one your SIL gives your BIL silently indicating that my kids are the shit beneath her shoe? yeah, that one.) and get away as fast as they can, leaving a smoke trail.  And while they are running they are probably passing judgment on Rocky’s mom.  Mind you, when I first turned down the aisle and heard all the commotion my first thought was, “Awe shit…..all I wanted was some pencils.”  It was immediately after that thought that RM and I made eye contact and I realized that, like anyone else with or without kids, she is just trying to get through this part of her day.  Everyone does that, the day turns shitty and your immediate thoughts turn to phrases such as ‘patience is a virtue,’ ‘this too shall pass,’ ‘please, just let me get through this,’ etc, etc.  Again, we all do it.  RM was trying to get the little man’s school supplies at mock speed, a task that shouldn’t be taken lightly as those school supply lists are from the devil himself.  Our eye contact indicated a moment of understanding.  Rocky was acting like, well, I guess, Rocky and little sister was in the cart screaming her head off fixing to spew split pea soup from every orifice.  Having to have recently purchase school supplies I could feel RM’s pain.  I wanted to tell her that I know this sucks donkey balls but it’ll be ok, she didn’t need that from me, she just needed to say ‘F- it, I’ll come back another time,’ thus leading me into my biggest pet peeve, passing judgment on others.

Thinking back I have always worried about what people think of me, what people say about me, what others opinions of me and my actions and I have always held what someone else thinks to a much higher regard than my own thoughts and opinions.  Growing up, Jennifer and I were always so polished and good mannered that we always seemed Stepford like.  I mean, I was considered the wild child because I always have to get the last word and don’t always want to take someone else’s crap, but that is the worst that it got.  My parents never had to nurse a hangover, I NEVER tried drugs, there was a Playboy magazine incident with a friend and a sleepover but we will just gloss right over that one, past is the past……right?  At any rate, we were good kids because my mother was concerned about what others thought about her children and worked very hard to make us those good kids.  Now, at 37-years-old I am very thankful for that up bringing but I am also at the point that I am so over the judgment.  I’m tired of the hushed whispers about what I’m wearing, my weight, my kids, my hair, my house, yadda, yadda, yadda……get a F*#^ing life!!!!  When I hear the whispers or see the looks my first thought is to say, “who the hell are you?  at what point did you become better than me?”  And that’s where it all lies, the holy grail, that snarky ‘I’m better than you, because….’ attitude.  I also want to thank those people because they have helped me decrease my judgment by 90% (random #, sounds good though?); it is because of those people that when I see the Rocky’s of the world my first thoughts aren’t about lack of parenting but how cute he/she is, or any other immediately noticeable redeeming quality.  I want to pass good judgment, be the good person, because that is who I am and that is who I want to be.  Yes, I want other people to know that about me…..I’m not always a snarky bitch, I do use my powers for good some of the time it’s just that you may not always see that goodness.  Why do you have to see the good to form an opinion?  Why can’t one just keep open-minded until ACTUAL interaction?  All in all, it’s not my place to judge RM, or anyone else for that matter.  Yes, we shared eye contact and a brief smile but that was it….does she use her powers for good or evil?  Who knows?  I sure as shit don’t because I don’t know her thus I cannot pass judgment.  Are we getting my theme here people?  What I do is really none of your damn business, and, I have finally gotten to the point in my life where I do things for myself and not what others think I should do.

Not to beat a dead horse into the ground (such a horrible phrase isn’t it?), but we live in a world of freedom and goodness, so, why, pray tell, must we pass judgment upon others?  Do something else that makes you feel better about yourself.  Here is a novel thought, focus on your life and what you can do to be better rather than looking down your nose at your fellow man.  The last time I checked we all came from the same place, regardless of sex, race, religion, music choice (I could go on and on but I won’t), you are no better than me and if you need me to kick you off your high horse then I am your girl…………….so, call me, maybe?

I’m done with my judgment rant for the moment but this is something I feel so strongly about that this won’t be the last you hear about this topic.  Got to get the kids up and going!!

Toodles

xoxo